Ty Ranks the 2023 NFL Teams: Regional Grocery Store Brand Cola Division

Welcome to day three of my preseason NFL rankings. We are going to be at the playoff teams soon, but not until next week.

At number 24 I have the Carolina Panthers. The Panthers had the number one pick and used it on Bryce Young. Young is one of the better QB prospects to come along in some time. He is a gamer, he has won the most high stakes games, he performs under pressure and he can tuck it and run if need be. He is small, but that doesn't really matter with the heart he plays with. But, he is a rookie and there will be a learning curve for sure. Andy Dalton is not the answer they need at backup QB. They were able to sign Miles Sanders away from Philadelphia, and they also got Adam Thielen. Both of them are due for a setback, and may be past their prime. DJ Chark is okay enough, but not a true threat. The o line is still a work in progress and will need time to mold. They weren't the best, or even close to it, last season. The defense leaves a ton to be desired. Brian Burns is very good, elite perhaps, but will be double and tripled teamed all season. Jaycee Horn is an okay corner, but not upper tier yet. One of their d ends, Henry Anderson, is already fighting injuries. This defense is not even close to the level they were when they were in the Super Bowl. Neither is the offense. And while I do think they got the best QB prospect in the draft, it is going to take a few years before Bryce Young is playing in critical games again.

At number 23 I have the Tennessee Titans. I feel awful for Derrick Henry. He deserves so much better than this franchise. He is far too good to be wasted playing for a team with no real hope for contention. Ryan Tannehill is still the starter. Why? Malik Willis was not given a real chance and then they drafted Will Levis. He has looked rough in camp, they are unwilling to play Willis, so they are settling for Tannehill. That is a problem. I was excited for a second when they signed Deandre Hopkins, but then I sat back and thought about it. What will he bring? How is Tannehill going to get him the ball? Is he going to really make defenses forget about Derrick Henry to focus on him? I don't think he moves the needle too much. Treylon Burks got hurt the other day. The o line is okay. If they were a little better Derrick Henry would be obliterating rushing records though. The defense is pretty new and unknown. Jeffrey Simmons is middle of the road now. Same for Harold Landry. Kevin Byard is a step slower. There is too much uncertainty with this group. Also, they are going to have to overuse Derrick Henry yet again to try and control the clock. The Titans had a moment, but that moment has passed. They need to rebuild.

At number 22 I have the Washington Commanders. Sam Howell was just named their starting QB. Yikes. He is not the answer. I would have gone with Jacoby Brissett. He has at least played and won at this level. Brian Robinson is a quality starting running back. He can do some things. Terry McLaurin is one of the better wideouts in the league. Jahan Dotson has his rookie year under his belt and I think he will have a good year. Logan Thomas is a fine tight end. The o line is okay. The defense should be better than they actually are though. Chase Young cannot stay healthy and he has not produced like I thought he would. Kendall Fuller should be better. Montex Sweat was a draft steal, but he hasn't hit his true potential yet. David Mayo is blah at linebacker. The defense just isn't at a playoff level. That and Sam Howell will keep this team at 7 or 8 wins.

The final team for the day, at number 21 I have the Denver Broncos. They have Sean Payton, a legit head coach. Russell Wilson should rebound from a very bad season. Javonte Williams is a serviceable back. Jerry Jeudy has all the tools to be a number 1 wideout. The o line is very good. But this offense was horrendous last year. Russell Wilson was not the answer they needed at QB. They don't treat the running backs well. The wideouts never got real looks. Will that change with Sean Payton at the helm and Russell Wilson looking to bounce back? Hopefully, but who knows. The defense went out and signed Frank Clark after the Chiefs let him walk. He is good on the field, but he has off field issues. They also have a very similar guy to Clark in Randy Gregory, except he has been suspended for off field stuff once already by the NFL. Pat Surtain is awesome, but he is the only quality secondary player they have. I just do not know what to expect from this team coming into this season. When I'm in that scenario I tend to be pessimistic. I don't know that Wilson will fully recover from last year. I think Williams will be overused. Jeudy won't get enough looks. The defense will not stop enough dudes and may get into too much off field trouble. The Broncos are too much of a toss up and I'm erring on the side of an average team at best.

That does it for today and this week. Come back Monday for the next four teams. 

Ty

Ty is the Pop Culture editor for SeedSing and the other host of the X Millennial Man Podcast.

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Ty's 2022 NFL Preview - When You're Out of Schlitz Division

Welcome to day two of my 2022 NFL countdown. We are still at the bottom of the barrel. But we will be getting to the good teams soon, I promise. On with the countdown.

At number 28 I have the Jacksonville Jaguars. The Jags did the best thing they could have during last season when they fired Urban Meyer. He was an absolute disaster. It went worse than I thought it would. Doug Pederson was a solid hire too. He has a ring as a coach and he is good with QB's. That should sit very nicely with Trevor Lawrence. He should get better, although I do not think his rookie year was as bad as some made it out to be. Travis Etienne is back after missing his whole rookie year, and the familiarity with him and Lawrence should be nice. I am curious to see how explosive he can be. Other than these two, the offense is pretty rough. Christian Kirk and Marvin Jones are done. Evan Engram has not been a good pro. The O line is a sieve. The defense is young and bad. Travon Walker is an incredible athlete, but he is raw. He needs time. Josh Allen is good, but he gets double teamed a ton. I like the Shaquill Griffin signing, but he can't cover everyone. The Jags are doing a slow rebuild, as they should. But this team is a far cry from where they were a few years back when they made the AFC title game, and then I picked them to win the Super Bowl next year. They are a 6 win team at best.

My number 27 team is the Washington Commanders. Look, I like Ron Rivera, but this team is not good. They are a worse version of Rivera's Panthers teams. They do not have a Cam Newton type QB. They don't have a defense even close. The Commanders are not good. Carson Wentz stinks. He is not good. Nick Foles was a much better QB in Philly. Johnathan Taylor carried the Colts last year, and when Wentz was needed to get into the playoffs, he crapped the bed. Wentz is a bust. Antonio Gibson is a mediocre back. The receivers, outside of Terry Mclaurin, who is very, very good, are bad or young. Jahan Dotson is a rookie. I didn't even know Curtis Samuel was still in the league. Logan Thomas is hurt and not great. I'm not into this O line. The defense has Chase Young, who is an incredible player, but he is hurt again and has no help. Montez Sweat still needs time. Kendall Fuller is decent, but the rest of the D is a bunch of dudes I have never heard of. And I know a good amount about football. The Commanders are stuck in the mud. They are in a bad division, and that helps, but when they only win 6 games, that means they are stuck missing the playoffs yet again.

At number 26 I have the Seattle Seahawks. How the mighty have fallen. Ever since they passed, instead of giving the ball to Marshawn Lynch on the goal line, the Seahawks have ceased to be a consistent team. And now they have traded away Russell Wilson. This team is going nowhere fast. Geno Smith has never put it together. He just doesn't seem to have it. And Drew Lock is flat out bad. Their running game is suspect, but I do like the Kenneth Walker III pick. He was a beast in college. Tyler Lockett and DK Metcalf are legit wideouts, but they have no QB throwing them the ball. Metcalf got a big contract. but he is going to see his numbers drop significantly this season. And Noah Fant is very mediocre. The O line has always been a problem, and they still haven't done much to fix it. This defense, once feared, is not good anymore. Outside Jamal Adams they have absolutely no one that strikes fear in opponents. Quandre Diggs is good, but not great. This linebacking core is nowhere near the Legion of Boom days. The D line cannot get pressure on the QB. They just do not have it anymore. The hater in me loves to see this team taking a step back. But the Seattle fan in me, I loved the Sonics, is bummed for their fans. The Seahawks are a 6 win team. They are on the wrong side of a rebuild right now.

The final team for the day, at number 25, I have the Detroit Lions. Now, I want to say that I do think the Lions will be better this year. I also really like the direction they are going in right now. They had the best draft in my opinion. I also like some of their offseason moves. They just need another year before they are in playoff talks. Jared Goff is incredibly mediocre. He is an okay enough game manager, but he doesn't go out and win games for you. He can grit and grind 200 passing yards, on short pass plays, but he has never been able to completely take over. De'Andre Swift and Jamaal Williams are a good one two punch at running back. They can do some things. I also really like Amon-Ra St. Brown. He should build upon a decent rookie year. Jameson Williams should be good, but he is hurt. DJ Chark also needs to show he can stick in this league. TJ Hockenson is a very good tight end. The O line is solid too. They have drafted well there. The offense could be much better if they had a better QB. The defense is going to be solid. Obviously I am a big fan of the Adian Hutchinson pick. He is a very, very good defensive end. He is going to wreck havoc. I think he's going to be very good for a very long time in the NFL. Michael Brockers is a very good interior D lineman. The secondary has solid youth and big play ability. Again, I like this team, but they are young and they need a year to figure it all out. That being said, I could see the Lions winning 7 games this season and be the sexy pick to make the playoffs next season. They aren't ready yet, but they will be soon.

That's it for today. Come back tomorrow for the next four teams.

Ty

Ty is the Pop Culture editor for SeedSing and the other host of the X Millennial Man Podcast.

Come and support Ty and the podcast on Patreon.

Follow Ty on instagram and twitter.

SeedSing is funded by a group of awesome people. Join them by donating to SeedSing.