Ty Watches "Goon: Last of the Enforcers"

I am not a fan of hockey as a sport. I find it very boring and, quite frankly, stupid. This could be because I cannot skate, I never played it as a kid, I never watched it as a kid, there are so many reasons. I just flat out dislike hockey. But, for some odd reason, I do enjoy movies about hockey. I think it is because the movies only show the "exciting" parts of the game. I don't have to deal with any of the other nonsense, and I get to just see the goals and fights. That is all I want to see anyway. I can sit down and watch "Mighty Ducks", or "D2" anytime it is on cable. I have seen "Slap Shot" a handful of times. "Happy Gilmore" has hockey moments in it, and that is one of my all time favorite movies.

But, all of these hockey movies pale in comparison to the wonderful "Goon". That movie is amazing. I saw it on Netflix when it was recommended to me by many people and I was blown away. "Goon" was funny, bloody, raunchy and even a bit moving. Sean William Scott was absolutely perfect as Doug "The Thug" Blatt. This is one of his best roles. In fact, I think he has totally redeemed himself and made himself a great actor and gotten out of the shadow of Stifler. He should be talked about as much as Channing Tatum. I feel like they have both had a great second life as actors.

So, when a sequel to "Goon" was announced, and that Jay Baruchel was going to direct, I was on board. Baruchel co wrote "Goon", so I figured with him directing we would get much of the same. I couldn't get out to the theaters to see it, but I just recently rented and watched "Goon: Last of the Enforcers". And, the movie was okay. It was not even close to the greatness that "Goon" was, but that was an impossible achievement. Everyone is back from the first movie. The hippy goalie, the Russian brothers, Stevenson, La Flamme, the coaches, Alison Pil, Liev Shrieber, Jay Baruchel and Sean William Scott. This time around they added Elisha Cuthbert, in a totally off form role for her, which she was great at, and Wyatt Russell, as the villain.

"Goon: Last of the Enforcers" starts out with the NHL on strike, so this semi pro league that Blatt's team plays in is, for better or worse, the main attraction. This is what everyone in Canada watches. We see the team being give their jerseys and Blatt is named a team captain. Blatt is still the same type player, an enforcer. He is out there to protect his teammates and get into fights. In their first game they face a team that the owners son plays on, this is Wyatt Russell's character. He is a younger, faster and better overall hockey player than Blatt has ever been. They get into a fight in the game, and Russell destroys him. It was a great fight scene. This is when "GLOTE" really shines. The fight scenes are the best moments of the movie. They are just as gory and brutal as they were in "Goon".

Blatt gets his shoulder all messed up, and he has to turn away from hockey. His wife, Pil, is also pregnant with their kid. Blatt goes into insurance, but he hates it. He starts to get the itch to play again when he watches his old team, who has now traded for Russell, and they are miserable. Russell is a great hockey player, but he is also very selfish and crazy. To get himself back into playing shape, Blatt tracks down Schreiber, his nemesis from the first movie. Schreiber is fighting in brawl type competitions because he cannot pull himself away from the game he loves. He helps Blatt learn how to fight with his off hand. The scenes of them working together are pretty good too.

Blatt eventually gets back on the team, but Pil doesn't want him to fight. She needs him around for their kid. He heeds her demands at first. But, in the final regular season game, after the team releases Russell and he is back on his original team, he has to fight him again. Russell knocks out Schreiber, so Blatt goes out to defend his friends honor. He does beat up Russell, but ruins his shoulder in the process. He will never play hockey again.

I mean, "GLOTE" was a fine movie, but it was very color by the numbers. You could tell beat for beat what was going to happen as it happened. That doesn't mean it was a bad movie, I just feel like it may have been a bit unnecessary. "Goon" was classic. I feel like they should have stopped there. But, I get why they made a sequel. No one expected "Goon" to be as great as it was, so why not do it again. Look, everyone was good in this movie. Sean William Scott was great. Jay Baruchel was hilarious. Alison Pil was good. Elisha Cuthbert was just as funny as Baruchel. Schreiber was fine. Even Russell was a decent villain. I just feel like they didn't have to make this movie.

"GLOTE" is fine to have on when you just want to zone out and watch a sports movie. But, when comparing it to the original, it is not even close. I'm glad I watched it, but I will take "Goon" any day over "GLOTE". It was a fine movie, but it was unnecessary.

Ty

"American Horror Story" Opened with the Terror of Trump, Then a Clown Showed Up

Ty's tv once the clown showed up

I do not watch the show "American Horror Story". I have made this exact statement on the podcast, and now, I'm saying it on the site. The show is terrifying. I do not like to be scared by real life stuff. This show does dramatizations of some real stories and it freaks me out. Hell, I am even scared of the theme song. The commercials leading up to this season scared the hell out of me. I'd be watching "the Simpsons", and bam! an "American Horror Story" commercial would come on and horrify me. My wife loves the show. She watches it religiously. She stays up late to watch the episodes in real time so she doesn't have anything spoiled for her. She is a big time fan.

With all this being said, I wanted to watch the opening scene of the newest season last night. I have read and heard many things about how this season of "AHS" was going to have some kind of focus on the horrific events that occurred in November. You all know what I am talking about. I had heard that the first 10 minutes was totally worth watching for anyone and everyone that is very upset and horrified by what happened in November. So, I told my wife that I wanted to see the opening scene. I did not want to watch the entire episode, no way, but I wanted to see what all the hubbub was about. I am also very luke warm on Ryan Murphy as a writer, but this is a subject that he knows very well. I assume he is liberal, so I wanted to see how he handled all the crazy, inexplicable things that happened in the last election.

When the show started I was immediately shocked back to how upset I was the night of November 7th. The show started with that golfing, racist oaf accepting the Republican nomination. The very next scene had the rightful winner, the people's choice for president, Hilary Clinton, accepting the Democratic nomination. Then "AHS" kept showing all the media coverage trying to come to grips with what was happening. The CNN's, MSNBC's, BBC's, every news network except for one big omission, by choice I assume, trying to grasp what was happening. It brought back very painful memories for me. I was, and still am, very upset and feel betrayed by what happened 7 months ago. It was a travesty, and now, especially with this ridiculous DACA repeal, god I hope it doesn't pass, I am even more terrified by what this so called "government" and the most heartless group of Republicans in history continues to do everyday. I am so terrified by what they want to take away from people that cause them no harm.

The horror was played so expertly by Sarah Paulson. She and Alison Pil play a married couple with a young child. They live in a fancy-ish home and they are clearly a liberal family. When the news that Clinton had stepped back, Paulson's character immediately starts sobbing and seems to be having a panic attack. She is walking around her house cursing the names of anyone that said that Clinton had this election in the bag. She couldn't fathom how that racist oaf "won" the election. Pil, her wife, was there to console her, telling her to do her breathing exercises and to try and calm down. Paulson could not. She was beside herself. Their housekeeper was there with the child, and she was trying to shield her from seeing one of her parents act this way. The little girl says to Paulson, after she has calmed down for a minute, "I don't want you two to have to get divorced, I want you two to still be my parents". This was absolutely heart breaking, and all too real. Paulson and Pil reassured her that they were not going anywhere. This only further set off Paulson.

On the opposite end, Evan Peters, who is a terrifying psychopath in every season of "AHS", plays a supporter of the racist, golfing orange buffoon. His character is so thrilled by the outcome that he is literally humping his television and saying that a revolution was going to start. At one point he puts a bunch of cheese poofs in a blender and grinds them to a dust. The next time we see him, he shows up in his sister's room, a Clinton supporter, with the cheese poof dust covering his face so he can look like his "hero" I presume. She asks him if he is there to gloat, and he just creepily stares at her face and tries to wipe some dust on her face. She pushes him away and he leaves the room.

There is also a family of Spanish decent and all of them are very upset at the outcome, and they are all complaining about the lack of people that voted. This was the group I identified with most from what I saw. They were so upset that people just decided to forgo their voting, thinking it didn't matter. That is wrong and one of the main reasons that what happened actually happened.

After this first 10 minutes or so some super creepy clown showed up, and as you all know by now I am absolutely horrified by clowns, I left the room. I was already upset by what I had seen because it brought up so many old, bad memories. It was like reopening a scar that I just cannot get rid of. Then the clown showed up, and I was out. I told my wife I was going to bed to watch sports to get my mind off of what I had just seen. But, as I said, this was almost too real an opening scene for a fictional show. It was almost documentary like. It showed all sides the night of the election, and I have to say, Ryan Murphy and the group of writers absolutely nailed it.

I will not be watching anymore of "AHS: Cult" because I do not need to relive the last 7 months, I am living it now, and the show has a terrifying, killer clown on it. But, this season, at least the opening scene, perfectly captured the reactions from, at the very least, 3 groups of people that the outcome will effect, either positive or negative. That being said, there is no positive that came from that terrible night in early November. Ryan Murphy did a masterful job though, this cannot be understated at all. I'm not a fan, as I said, but he did a great job with this source material. I'm sure my wife will tell me about the episodes, but after seeing the first 10 minutes last night I was reminded why I choose to not watch this show. While it is a great show, it is horrifying and this season, it is all too real.

Ty

Ty is the Pop Culture editor for SeedSing and the other host of the X Millennial Man Podcast. He wants to live in a country where the majority of people hava a choice in who their President is. A place like the United States in 2008 and 2012. That's right, Obama crushed his competition and won more votes than any one, ever. That is Trump's American Horror Story.

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