The Latest Rolling Stone Top 100 Song List is Stupid

As I was strolling the internet today I came across Rolling Stone and they put out a new article ranking the best 500 songs of all time. Rolling Stone does this from time to time. They put out these lists, they get people talking, they get people arguing and they make arbitrary picks for what their writers believe are the best songs or albums or movies or whatever they feel like talking about that day. I will say, I am talking about it on the internet today, so they did pull me in, but I want to talk about how absurd and pointless it is to make lists like this.

I do my top five lists at the end of every year, but I make it very clear that it is my personal opinion. My picks have no reference base for anyone else. I think my picks are solid, but if people disagree with me, that is okay. I truly do not mind. I actually like it because, sometimes, less than I would hope, I get some good recommendations. But Rolling Stone doing these lists are all about getting clicks and getting likes. They cater to a younger audience. Some of the songs on the list I have never heard of, and I listen to a ton of different music. They also leave off very good artists because they are not well known enough for the majority of Rolling Stone's reading audience.

Personally, I do not think songs should be on an "all time" list unless they have been out for at least a decade. Songs need time to sit and grow. Songs on all time lists need to be around for a while before they make a best of all time list. I do think an artist like Lil Nas X is very important, I love how he markets himself and his music, but "Old Town Road" came out two years ago. And the song is very short and a very cliché country song. I bet when Rolling Stone does this list again ten years from now "Old Town Road" will not be on the list. I do think "Truth Hurts" by Lizzo is a tremendous song, but she has better songs. She has also barely been on the scene. Give her time. Hell, her new song with Cardi B, "Rumors", is better than "Truth Hurts". So is "Better in Color" or "Juice" or "Like a Girl". I also do not know that a Solange Knowles song should be on there before Beyonce. Solange is another very talented artist, but her older sister is so much better. Also, we need to retcon everything we know about Kanye, so his songs should not be here. I'm also not a fan of throwing a dozen Taylor Swift songs on the list. She is a fine artist, but come on. She needs to be in the game for a bit longer. I also do not like the fact that they put Coldplay songs on this list. Everyone makes fun of that band. Everyone. They write cheeky, goofy pop songs. Or how is a song like "Wonderwall" in the top 100. Sure, it is a solid song, but not one of the 100 greatest songs of all time. Not even close. Kelly Clarkson is a great artist as well, but "Since You've Been Gone" is the top 90? There are way better break up songs way further down on this list. No LCD Soundsystem song should be in the top 100. This has to have been from the hipster group of writers. And again, I adore LCD Soundsystem. I also do not know what the deal is with Leonard Cohen's "Hallelujah", but how that song makes all these lists is so far beyond me. Having MIA's "Paper Planes" in the top 50 must be a joke. No way is "Seven Nation Army" a better song than "When Doves Cry". "Royals" is not even Lorde's best song, and they have that at 30. A song by synth pop star Robyn is in the top 20, and I have never heard it before. No way does "Smells Like Teen Spirit" belong in the top 50, and they have it at five. It is so funny to me that the highest ranked Bob Dylan song is "Like a Rolling Stone". Total promotional pick.

This list is rife with hipster/company people picking what they want their bosses to be happy with. There is no joy or fun in this. It is all very common or ridiculous. There is no middle ground. But again, this is only a handful of people at Rolling Stone picks. This is who they were either told to put on here, or decided they had to have these songs on the list. If I did a top 500 songs of all time list it would greatly differ, but I am not going to do it for a myriad of reasons, number one being how arbitrary making a list like this truly is. This is all about opinion. If they sat down with real musicians, or people that have worked their whole life using science to figure out what are truly the best songs ever, scientifically, maybe I would take it a little more seriously. But this is typical Rolling Stone nonsense.

Read the very long list if you want to, but try not to let it make you too angry. That would be a waste of your time.

Ty

Ty is the Pop Culture editor for SeedSing and the other host of the X Millennial Man Podcast.

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