I’m going to go old man today and gripe about something that I saw while driving around this past Tuesday.
I was out with my daughter, heading to the playground, and we drove by a Starbucks. Now, Starbucks is fine when it is the only option. On a road trip is when Starbucks really steps up. But, if I have a chance, I go to a local shop or even a Tim Horton’s, which has some of the best coffee anywhere anytime. I’m also a big fan, as you all know, of Kaldi’s Coffee. But, I do have the occasional Starbucks. Yes, I’m one of those people who thinks their coffee tastes burnt. They clearly over roast their beans. But, it works in a pinch.
Anyway, what drove me to anger Tuesday was, when we drove by, I saw a sign that read, “it’s pumpkin spice season!”.
I was confounded.
First off, I’m a guy who enjoys my coffee sweet. But, pumpkin spice is way, way too sweet. I love pumpkin pie, and the pumpkin spice latte makes the pie taste savory. It’s too much. Also, this is a bone of contention in my home because my wife loves them. We debate about pumpkin spice lattes around this time of year every year.
What really threw me was the timing. We are not even close to fall, which is when all things pumpkin usually show up. The date when I saw the sign was August 28th. My son has only been in school for 2 weeks. It was still 100 degrees outside here in Saint Louis. It is still summer time. The weather, and the calendar still say it’s summer. Hell, it has “cooled” off a bit today, but it’s still in the low 80’s outside. How does any of this say fall to the marketing geniuses at Starbucks? Also, releasing the pumpkin spice in August is insane. They should wait, at the very earliest, for the end of September. I have not seen anyone put up fall or Halloween decor yet in my neighborhood, and I live in a spot where people love to dress up there front yards for whatever holiday it is. So I’m baffled that Starbucks felt now was the right time to put out this latte.
I’m sure it sold a ton, it’s a limited item, but come on. This was, and is becoming, a clear cash grab. People see “get your #PSL”, or, “it may not feel like fall yet, but a PSL will put you in the fall mood”, and they lose their god damn minds. They have to get one. It’s a little odd. I just don’t like it. We are in a rush now to push seasons so coffee shops can sell limited bull shit.
I’m not a fan.
I will not be buying any pumpkin spice lattes and I’m a little appalled at the release date of the first ones. Wait awhile Starbucks, you will still get people to buy them in waves if you wait until it actually is fall. It just made me real mad and I have a platform to say why. Take this as you will. Yes, I’m grumpy, but you have to admit, August is way too early to start selling pumpkin flavored coffee.
Ty is the Pop Culture editor for SeedSing and the other host of the X Millennial Man Podcast. He is going to lose his mind on September 4th when he sees the massive Christmas display in Macy's. Who doesn't think of the North Pole when it is 100 degrees outside?
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