Coping with the Unreality of Reality Television

I've talked about reality shows a lot on this website. I also watch, or watched, a good amount of reality shows. I still check in from time to time on reality shows my wife watches on the weekends. But I have been putting more thought into them lately, probably more than the creators, I kid. But I have been trying to suss things out about some of the shows that I watch and have watched.

As I get older I am getting a bit cynical about these "reality" shows. They don't really live up to the hype anymore. They are retreads. They are rip off shows. And they are horrible for the television industry because they put a ton of people out of work. This has been on my mind a lot lately. I find myself even thinking about these shows when they are not on. I don't know what that says about me, but here we are.

I think my biggest issue as of late is the fact that these shows are not actual, true "reality" shows. There is nothing real about them at all. If they were factual, if they were real, they would be tiring and very boring. Think about your everyday life. How boring is it really? I know that if I were to be filmed for a reality show, and if they stuck to actual reality, it would be a total snooze fest. The cameras would see me go through my routine. I get my kids ready for school in the morning. I run errands or have coffee with my dad and friends. I come home and do chores around the house. I go for a run. And then the night is filled with taking kids to sports, having dinner and going to bed. Pretty tiresome huh? That is how I know these reality shows are actually real. Real life is boring. But if you do a few takes of a conversation, add alcohol and try to start a conflict, that is a recipe for intriguing "reality" shows. I have read that these reality shows have copious amounts of alcohol just laying around. I feel like the producers of the shows think that if there is alcohol around, and most of the people enjoy alcohol, they will loosen up and let it fly a bit. That is why there is rarely ever a person on a reality show that has chosen to not drink. I would never be in a reality show because I choose to not partake in alcohol. I would, as I am prone to say in this piece, be very boring.

Take a show like "Love is Blind". My wife is very much into this show and I will sit down with her and watch or listen in the background while I am doing something around the house. This is the fakest "reality" show on tv. They go so far as to have everyone drink from the exact same style cup. The cups are all the same, even when they go to stores, parties or are at their home or their parents homes. That is for continuity. Which leads me to another point. The fact that the glasses have to be the same, so as not to show drinks being consumed, that means they do multiple takes of supposed "real" conversations. There was a very big blow up the other night and the fact that someone cried, I was completely taken out of it because I noticed the glass. This made me question how many times they asked this girl to cry, or how many times they had this dude call her horrible names. And that happens all the time on these shows. It looks like it is a conversation unfolding in real time until you start to think about tv and the fact that they need the correct lighting and that they have to be able to fully hear everything and that the clothing has to be the same, it is all made up.

You could even put cooking competitions in this conversation. I cannot believe that a "Chopped" contestant can think on the fly as fast as these competitors do on the show. They come up with these crazy dishes in a matter of seconds. I have to believe that they have a little bit, at the very least, of an idea of what is coming in those baskets. And they also have to make multiple dishes in an allotted time. Stuff has to get messed up that we never see in the finished product on our tv's.

I could go on and on with other reality shows, but these two came straight to my mind when I thought of this piece. Reality shows are not based in reality. Sorry if that bursts people's bubbles. But I'm not here to tell you not to watch them. If you like reality shows, watch as much as you want. That may be your steez. They just aren't for me and I am going to continue to see what other things I notice while watching them. I will just keep it to myself when I watch with my wife. 

Ty

Ty is the Pop Culture editor for SeedSing and the other host of the X Millennial Man Podcast.

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"Love is Blind" Is No Longer Worth Your Time

My wife is very much into the show "Love is Blind". I used to be into it as well, but the last season was boring, dull and filled with all the cliche things that dating shows now have. I barely watched any of this new season. My wife would put it on and I'd sink into my phone or the Switch or would just read. I would pop in and out to give a rude remark, but I stopped doing that after a while because it was no good for anyone.

This newest season came and went without much of any impact on, or even my wife honestly. She seemed into the season, but not like she was before. But she was ready for the reunion. A lot of people were. She set up her whole night so we could watch this live event at 7pm our time. We ate dinner early. She got cleaned up early. I got the kids cleaned up and sent them downstairs to watch tv together so they wouldn't bother my wife. She sat down, started to do her nails and went to turn on the livestream a little before 7pm.

There was a problem. I'm sure most of you know about the problem that occured. Netflix's live stream crashed. People couldn't get on the stream. Twitter was ablaze, so was Facebook. People were angry. For real angry. My wife was annoyed, but not so angry. But it kept stopping right at 25 percent. We saw the number on the screen and the spinning red circle and it never got past 25 percent. After a while my wife gave up. She waited about an hour and called it. I respect that about her. She wasn't going nuts, yelling about it, going online to complain. She waited as long as she deemed necessary and then watched other shows. She was content to wait until Monday. I didn't care either way. I got to watch the NBA playoffs, so I was pumped about that. But I did promise I'd watch the reunion with her on Monday.

And we did.

We watched for about an hour. The reunion special, this supposed massive live event that was riddled with problems, was 90 minutes long. That is far, far too long for any reality dating show reunion. None of these people are that important and the advice that they give out is god awful. I mean, why would any reasonable person take advice from these numbskulls is beyond me. But the people on the internet promised this reunion was "the most explosive one yet" and "incredibly revealing" and "endlessly watchable". It was none of that. And this is not just cynical old me talking. My wife kept stating how bored she felt. She kept asking for more. She wanted the tea to be spilled. She likes that stuff when it comes to reality shows. None of that happened. There was nothing shocking or explosive or revealing. It was dummies talking to other dummies about nonsense. I also find it disgusting that the people who go on these shows always complain about being filmed constantly and that things are taken out of proportion. They agreed to be on this show. Hell, they auditioned for it. They wanted the screen time, the supposed fame that comes with reality tv. They did not have to do this at all. Millions of people a day do not go on reality dating shows. So I have zero sympathy when they complain about how they look on tv. I have zero time for that.

I think what was most annoying about this whole "reunion event" was how boring and simple it was. There was no levity to it. There was nothing shocking or explosive. I cannot believe this is what crashed Netflix. Reality dating shows are a waste of time. I am getting to a point where most reality shows are of no consequence at all. They don't hold the weight they once did. I guess all of us are a bit more cynical now. But this "live" reunion was an absolute waste of time.

I want that 90 minutes back. It is my fault for watching I suppose. But, if you haven't watched, don't waste your time. It is nothing. Nothing but a bore.  

Ty

Ty is the Pop Culture editor for SeedSing and the other host of the X Millennial Man Podcast.

Come and support Ty and the podcast on Patreon.

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SeedSing is funded by a group of awesome people. Join them by donating to SeedSing.

Season Three of "Love is Blind" is One Season too Many

As you all may have heard on a recent X Millenial Man podcast, I enjoy reality dating shows. As much as I wish I did not like them, they always seem to suck me in. I get invested and I want to see how they end. I also like to do further research and see if the couples are still together after filming ends.

One such show that came into my life at the start of quarantine was "Love is Blind". Netflix dropped the first season maybe only a month or two into quarantine and it grabbed me. The whole concept of the show is to see if love is truly blind. There are two dorms of the opposite sex. They have twelve men and 1twelve women living in these dorms and they date members of the opposite sex. But while they are on these dates they cannot see each other. They have pods and they can talk for hours on end, but they do not get to see what each other looks like. It is a very simple premise, but the way the show is made, it is very watchable. The first season also came at a perfect time. I was watching anything to take my mind off of COVID and this was a great distraction. It was perfect.

I enjoyed the first season so much, so when the second season came out you better believe I was tuning in. While still solid, the second season started to show its cracks. The show became more focused on looks. The show started to show its vanity. The contestants did not look like people we see in the world everyday. The cast was more beautiful, more vain, more into themselves and it became tougher to watch. But I still found stuff to hang onto. I still found myself rooting for and against some of the couples. I still had an opinion. It still held weight with me. I was still invested. I was so deep in this season that when the reunion was aired I openly yelled at my TV at some of the things these people were saying.

My wife and I recently watched the entirety of the third season. This may be it for me. The show has lost all of the good will it had garnered in the first two seasons. The contestants are as vain as ever. They care far too much about looks. They care far too much about others. None of these couples should be together or stay together. None of it works. They are too plastic, too fake, not real at all, they are all caricatures of everyday people. It is fully a farce now. It is not even close to what we consider reality tv anymore. I get that reality tv is almost as staged as basic cable comedy or drama, but this is taking it even further. The conversations these contestants have, both in and out of the pods, are asinine. They make no sense. The people involved go from one major point to the next, contradicting themselves all along the way. At multiple points I heard people say stuff like, "there is no way I can marry this person", only to end up marrying them. Or they will say to their SO, "I cannot envision my life without you", and then break up with them. It is maddening.

This season also makes women look insane. The people involved do not do a good job of putting women in a good light. They make them look nuts and drunk and spineless and mean and vindictive. I am fully on the side of the women throughout this entire season. They are right. The men are wrong. They are assholes. They are immature little babies. They blame everyone but themselves. They are ugly inside and out. "Love is Blind" season 3 tries to prop these men up and they fail spectacularly. I did not like a single male contestant on this show. I could not even find little things I liked about any of them. They are all awful. The women, while not being held up to as big a standard, can all do far, far better than the dudes they ended up with. In particular Zenabe. She is so, so, so much better than Cole. Cole is a monster. He gaslights people. He makes people feel bad about themselves. He asked his girlfriend if she were bi polar at one point. I mean, he is a scumbag. And when Zenabe goes off on him, that was probably the only point that I cheered during this season.

Season three of "Love is Blind" is a mess. The show has fallen off. It has lost its way. It has given in to reality tv dating show tropes. I never took it seriously to begin with, but now it is a total farce. The show does not work like it did in early 2020. The jig is up. The show does not have that oomph it once had. I do not know if I will be tuning in to season four at this moment. Season three was so bad and mean and gross that it may have lost me as a viewer. Time will tell I suppose.

Ty

Ty is the Pop Culture editor for SeedSing and the other host of the X Millennial Man Podcast.

Come and support Ty and the podcast on Patreon.

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SeedSing is funded by a group of awesome people. Join them by donating to SeedSing.  

Ty Watches "Love is Blind"

I, like I hope most Americans are doing right now, am quarantining myself(I don’t have CoronaVirus), social distancing and only leaving the house to run, go to the store as needed and to take a little drive to clear my head. So, I need things to watch and do when I have down time and don’t want to go nuts thinking about this pandemic.

Welp, my wife said some friends of her said we should watch the Netflix dating show “Love is Blind”. We watched it all in a weekend, and it was as trashy, ridiculous, dumb, wild and fun as I hoped it would be. I was on the fence because I’m not a huge fan of dating shows. I think they’re all a little pointless. I know we live in a society where online dating is the best way to meet someone, or if you can’t do that, go on a reality TV show. Most of them follow the cliched format, and so does “Love is Blind”. But only for a minute.

The show starts out like most dating shows. They interview people, they have them all live in a house that’s filled with alcohol and no internet or TV and they film it all. The difference with “Love is Blind”, during the “dates”, the people cannot see one another. They sit in a room that is cut in half by what I think is a mirror and they just talk. They get to really know one another. They find out things about each other that would have never been done if they could look at each other. That is the brilliance of this show. It’s not like any other dating show I’ve seen. It’s not “Married at First Sight” or “The Swan” or “Joe Millionaire”. Those shows were almost a parody of dating shows. And while “Love is Blind” is a ridiculous dating show, at least they, for a few episodes, show how open people can be when they can’t see one another.

Then the premise, or the conceit if you will, of the show goes off the rails. When two people feel that they’ve really connected, they can’t just say they want to date or get to know the person, they have to get engaged. Then, if that’s not enough, when they finally do meet one another, after they’re engaged, they get to go on a trip to Mexico. It’s all honeymoon phase right off the top. They don’t see any foibles or anything truly intimate. Sure, some insecurities start to come out, and you can see some of the people truly regretting their decisions. But still, with one exception, the couples are all happy and living in this great moment. But then they come home and they’re all housed in the same apartment complex. This is when it gets real. This is when the fights, all the insecurities, the stupid pointless little tiffs start to rear their ugly heads. These couples get into ridiculous, pointless fights. Oh, they’re also given their phones back, and they get back to “real life” when they move into the apartments. This, of course, causes even more senseless drama. They then have to meet families, which is awkward and hilarious. Then, in the season finale, this is when they have to decide if they’re going to get married or not. Mind you, they’ve only been together for right around a month. They’ve only lived together for two weeks. They’ve only had one interaction with their soon to be spouse’s family. None of that is not nearly enough time to truly get to know someone, especially someone you’re about to spend the rest of your life with.

Of the five couples, only two went through with it. But, it was so very, very awkward to see the couples, who they had get tuxedos and wedding gowns, invite friends and family and have a ceremony, not go through with it. There was a reunion special, but it wasn’t much to write home about.

In the end, “Love is Blind” starts off super strong, gets better, then gets uncomfortable, then just kind of fades. I definitely recommend it, especially in our current situation. It’s a nice departure, and a good way to escape, even if it’s just for an hour per episode. I think you should check it out, especially if you are looking for something to distract you.

Ty

Ty is the Pop Culture editor for SeedSing and the other host of the X Millennial Man Podcast.

Come and support Ty and the podcast on Patreon.

Follow Ty on instagram and twitter.

SeedSing is funded by a group of awesome people. Join them by donating to SeedSing.